Despite waking up wicked early and halfway expecting to have my mind racing like a cat 5 because of it (didn't happen though), it has been a mostly quiet day. For the last couple of weeks it seems to have been the rule rather than the exception for that to happen in those early morning hours when I haven't gotten enough sleep.
I know the potential for that to happen is still there, but somewhere I am also hopeful that not having it happen today is a turning point for me.
Another personal turning point has been music. Normally when I'm having a lot of stress going on (whether internal or external) I cannot stand to listen to much (if any) music at all. I tend to listen for the emotional impact of music and sometimes that hits quite deeply. When that happens I have to stop listening for a while to lessen the impact from music versus impact of internal or external stress. Just too much to handle at the same time.
As for the whole family mess, I am hopeful but guarded about the situation. Last week was fairly quiet and then the walls came crashing down over the weekend, so needless to say I'm a bit guarded about the developments since then.
I have been told that I am a strong person in all of this, but that is not what I have felt like for the last 3 weeks. I have had some really bad days where it felt like I was totally losing control of everything. Not a feeling I like at all. Specially not when looking at how hard all of this has been on hubby and trying to give him some stability to deal with his personal emotional fallout from all of this.
Breathing easier but still taking it one day at a time.
I know the potential for that to happen is still there, but somewhere I am also hopeful that not having it happen today is a turning point for me.
Another personal turning point has been music. Normally when I'm having a lot of stress going on (whether internal or external) I cannot stand to listen to much (if any) music at all. I tend to listen for the emotional impact of music and sometimes that hits quite deeply. When that happens I have to stop listening for a while to lessen the impact from music versus impact of internal or external stress. Just too much to handle at the same time.
As for the whole family mess, I am hopeful but guarded about the situation. Last week was fairly quiet and then the walls came crashing down over the weekend, so needless to say I'm a bit guarded about the developments since then.
I have been told that I am a strong person in all of this, but that is not what I have felt like for the last 3 weeks. I have had some really bad days where it felt like I was totally losing control of everything. Not a feeling I like at all. Specially not when looking at how hard all of this has been on hubby and trying to give him some stability to deal with his personal emotional fallout from all of this.
Breathing easier but still taking it one day at a time.
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